Day 26 of 80 Days of Excellence
From the Cool Cat Teacher Blog by Vicki Davis
Follow @coolcatteacher on Twitter
The greatest battles are often in the brain just behind a person’s eyes. For that is where we try to mask the emotions and the vulnerability we feel when we finally admit to ourselves that things aren’t OK.
After reading the book, The Deeper Life, I was challenged by the author Daniel Henderson to write my personal theology statement. And one of my own goals is to
“live transparently before the God who knows my every thought.”
But people aren’t God. They don’t read minds. So, we have to COMMUNICATE.
People Don’t Read Minds (And You Can’t Either)
I opened up to someone today about something and they said,
“I had no idea you ever needed anything. You seem like you have everything together all the time.”
Well, I don’t.
I’m hurting. I’m having a hard time in some areas in my life right now. There are things I can’t and won’t talk about on social media. But just because I don’t spill my guts to all those “friends” who really aren’t my friends, doesn’t mean that the hurt isn’t there.
I bet you most of reading this post probably have problems you don’t share on social media either.
Oh Lord, It’s Hard to Be Vulnerable
But it is hard to be vulnerable. And truthfully, not everyone deserves to know your weaknesses.
It takes time to establish trust. It takes time to find trustworthy people.
But if you never open up and tell anyone that sometime is wrong, how are they supposed to know?
If you act like you’re perfect all the time, who is going to trust you?
If you don’t put yourself out there you won’t be hurt. You’ll never cry over the betrayal of a friend. You’ll never have your heart broken.
But you’ll also never cry when a friend has their first granddaughter. You’ll never feel your heart swell with pride as someone overcomes a struggle you’ve helped them through.
Vulnerability is hard and yet it is necessary to build trusting relationships.
- Are you willing to be vulnerable?
- Are you willing to admit that you’re not perfect?
- Do you need to have a conversation with someone and open up about something difficult you’re experiencing or a past mistake that might help a friend with a present problem?
Perfect is a lie. The sooner you stop pretending, the sooner you can be refreshingly human and perhaps move to a deeper level of friendship and intimacy with some important people in your life.